This is baby number two for us with our first being born at the peak of Covid, I wanted more than anything my dream birth. I dreamt of a beautiful, unmedicated, water birth in a hospital setting. My provider gave me the green light on my wishes, and I was looking forward to it my whole pregnancy.
He jokingly became "The baby who cried wolf" because by 37 weeks, we had been to the hospital three times with regular contractions - but none would bring our baby. By my 38 week appointment, I was just done.
I was so tired, everything hurt, I wanted to meet my baby, and being pregnant with a toddler is no joke! My doctor checked me at this appointment and I was 3cm and 90% effaced so I decided then that I would do a "light" induction of breaking my water. We scheduled this for the following weekend when I would be 39 weeks.
I was told to call the hospital at 7am on April 22nd to make sure they had room for me before heading in - So I called... I was told there was no room and to call back at noon to see if I could go in at 2pm - I called back at noon and was again told they could not take me and to try again at 6pm for an 8pm arrival.
What do you think - Was she able to go in at 8pm?
By this point, I was getting extremely frustrated - I hardly slept the night before because of the excitement thinking I would be going in at 7am to have my baby, only to be pushed back now what felt like a million times. I reluctantly called back at 6pm with now completely diminished hope. To my surprise though, they told me to come in! When I got to the hospital I was 5cm and 90% effaced. At about 10:30 they broke my water. I was told contractions would start within the next couple hours.
After a few position changes and feeling no relief, I headed for the tub. As soon as I got in though, I started to feel sick. I kept trying to remind myself that every contraction has a beginning, a peak, and an end. But they were so close it was more like beginning, peak - beginning, peak. This is when it just got to be too much and I told my husband I couldn't continue.
I'm quickly out of the tub and getting prepared for the epidural. I was so exhausted and needed some relief. I was practically begging my nurse for it to come faster. She had ordered the epidural but anesthesia was running a little behind. She was trying to help by pushing my hair out of my face and telling how well I was doing and holding my hand. Anesthesia finally came after what felt like forever, but was actually 37 minutes.
After the epidural was placed I remember just waiting for it to kick in - I was exhausted and still feeling them - until I wasn't and I was able to close my eyes and fall asleep. I woke up two hours later feeling a ton of pressure and the urge to push! My nurse came in to check me and told me I was complete and it's baby time!
I suddenly had a strong desire to have my mom there. I sent her a text that it was time and she was immediately on her way. Shortly after she arrived, it was time to start pushing. I pushed for 11 minutes and my baby boy Ermes was born at 6:31am on Sunday April 23rd, 2023. At 9lbs 6oz and 21" he completely took my breath away.
When Jessica asked if I wanted to share my story, I was hesitant. Still battling with the feeling ashamed and upset with myself for giving up. But after seeing my birth gallery and video, I was able to see how exhausted I was and realize that while this wasn't the birth I dreamed of, it was the birth I needed because I don't believe I could have continued and birthed my baby in that state of exhaustion.
